A recent poll by Associated Press suggests that people ages 45 to 65 are less happy with their sex lives than are people who belong to groups of peers who are either older or younger than so-called baby boomers. One reason may be that men and women ages 45-65 are more likely to be mismatched in terms of sexual desire, with men wanting sex more often than their female partners. At the same time, baby boomers also considered themselves to be pretty knowledgeable about sex, with about 59% of women and 50% of men reporting that they knew all they needed to know.
How to interpret these numbers? From my clinical experience, I've observed that boomers have high expectations for themselves and their partners, and the area of sex is no exception. Boomer men, for example, expect their bodies to respond with the same vigor as when they were young. Boomer women are often in denial about the effects of menopause. It isn't just sex hormones that change; since an older person's body is no longer developing, for example, growth hormone (aka the "master hormone"), which helps the body metabolize energy, is also being depleted.
Just as they've redefined almost every other institution, boomers may need to redefine what constitutes a satisfying sex life. Boomers may find themselves engaging in more oral and manual sex, for example, because these activities are generally less strenuous, which may make it easier to have orgasm. My guess is that boomers will at some point be the group that makes the largest purchases of sex toys, and who demand toys that work for both sexes like the We-Vibe.
I think as people enter their 60s and 70s, they are generally glad to have a partner and happy that they are still able to be sexual. Most mature adults in my practice do realize that they may have limitations, but they can enjoy their bodies and sexual release nonetheless. That happiness and acceptance may be the clue that can help boomers put their sex lives into perspective. Not everything in life needs to be a "peak experience" to have value.