Did you know that one of the top searches on the Internet is “sex positions”?
That tells us a couple of things:
- People use sex positions as a common way to spice things up
- People need information about how to do certain positions
- People think that the more positions they know, the better a lover they are
I think reasons #1 and #2 are legit, but reason #3, well, yes and no. Just knowing more positions doesn’t make someone a better lover. If you get too focused on positions, you may also be overly concerned with performance. Instead of showing your partner affection, you’re caught up in showing off sexual prowess. That’s usually considered a turn-off, not a turn-on!
In reality, there are really just a few positions with some variation. Here they are:
- Missionary position
- Woman-on-top
- Rear entry (aka “doggy style”)
- Standing up
If you’d like illustrations, check out this R-rated/bordering on PG-13 article from Cosmopolitan.
In any case, the best position for sex is…the one you enjoy! If you and your partner want to do missionary style every single time you have intercourse, go for it!
A few tips for making sexual positions better, easier, or more pleasurable:
- Use pillows to prop up body parts to make entry easier or to bring greater contact between genitals or other body parts. (Remember “Meet the Fockers,” where Barbara Streisand’s character used Liberator pillows?)
- Check in to see if the position really is pleasurable for your partner
- Use lubrication, always, but especially when trying a new position because you may be tense or find it awkward
- Try shifting around in the position, varying speed (slow, fast, slow alternating with fast), depth of penetration, direction (around in circles vs. in and out)
- Add a vibrator such as a vibrating cock ring or WeVibe, or use a small handheld vibrator (remember most women need direct clitoral stimulation to have orgasm
- Try the “coital alignment” technique
- Wait until you are really excited before beginning intercourse in any position to increase opportunity for female orgasm during penetration
- Experiment. The worst that can happen is that you will fall off the bed and have a good laugh!